Well folks, it's been a month and 5 days since Obama got in office. After a brutal two years on the campaign trail, he finally got his dream to become president. However, I would love to know what's going through his mind right now. The irony is that his platform slogans were "hope" and "change", and yet whenever he makes a speech the markets fall through the floor. If you've been watching the numbers at all, the economy is actually very consistent in how it shakes and rolls. After every economic speech of Obama, the drop rapidly. Bernacke came out yesterday to say that he highly doubted that the banks would be nationalized and the markets inched back up with a bit of real hope. Then, Obama came out last night and completely killed that momentum with his speech to congress. What is going on?

Was it something he said? I mean, come on! The guy basically surfed into the office on the tidal wave of "hope" and "change", and yet now all he does is bring the economy crashing down every time he makes a speech. Soon, he's gonna start up a blog so he doesn't have to make nationally televised speeches anymore. It's getting a bit ridiculous.

So far, what has the Obama administration done for us? They have passed the biggest "stimulation" bill in the history of this country, and blamed the entire mess on the Bush administration. Obama has no plan for reducing the debt outside of raising taxes on the wealthy and "cutting the budget" (whatever that means to a liberal). Many people will say, "It's only been a month! Give him time..." Guess what?!? That's my point! IT'S ONLY BEEN A MONTH. Imagine what this guy could do if given four years. I dread the thought.

From many different polls, the nation is weighing in. The majority thinks that Obama is the gloom-and-doom prophet on the issue of the economy. In a recent Rasmussen Poll, 55% said that the media makes the economy look worse than it is. While this isn't completely true (the economy is going downhill faster than we think), it shows that the majority of the American people don't believe everything the media chucks at them. This includes Obama's speeches.

If you saw the rant by Rick Santelli on CNBC the other day, you know what I'm talking about. The stockbrokers trust our new president about as far as they could throw the White House.

Next time, the solution to the economic problems we're facing.

-Cheers

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Ladies and Gentlemen, may I please have your attention? Scientists have recently discovered a new type of human. Yes, you heard me correctly, I said that scientists have discovered a new type of human. This human is actually superhuman in the fact that he can spot a disaster from a distance and rush in to save the day. The strength of Superman, the intelligence of Albert Einstein, the good looks of uh... a really good looking person, and of course the foreknowledge of Spiderman. This guy is truly the greatest superhero of our age. However, most people don't recognize him due to the fact that he hides in the most unlikely of places -- the limelight. Preferring to remain anonymous by becoming a household name in America, this man has actually risen to the highest echelon of government where he can completely wreak havoc on the bad guys and give hope to the good guys. This man, of course, is our new president Barack Obama!

The President's administration has finally released Obama's amazing plan of action. Apparently, Obama is going to deliver on all of his promises of cutting the federal deficit! It was reported that when the news was sent out over the wires, hospitals started calling in saying that they were having a higher incidence of heart attack patients who had just seen the headlines. Officials were unable to pinpoint whether the influx of heart problems was due to uncontainable joy or a massive laughing spasm.

To be sure, the nation is in shock over this momentousness announcement; yet, there are those few nay-sayers who dare to question the President's plan. Instead of just going along with the great tidal wave of "hope" and "change", these idiotic morons continue to annoy our great leader with their annoying questions of "how?" and "really?". These are obviously the same twits that Obama dismissed during the campaign as being "bitter" and clinging to their "guns" and "religion". However, now that tempers have somewhat abated, we can finally get to the bottom of what is obviously the greatest idea since sliced bread smothered in jam.

Apparently, Obama's idea is to reduce spending and raise taxes; since it's coming from the only man who knew the secret fact that there are actually 57 states, it must be true, right? Well, those bitter conservatives continue to raise a ruckus over the idea.

They say that Obama's plan will actually decrease the level of output in the economy and just send this nation into more of a recession. Consider their stupidity: they actually believe that taxing the wealthy and the businesses will lower production! Obviously the conservatives are wrong! I mean, when I am taxed, I just want to go throw myself headlong into the production sphere and generate more income so that I can send more money away to my friendly neighborhood government!

(at this moment, please take time to go read The Audacity of Hope and refresh yourself in the teachings of our amazing leader)

The president has been in the oval office just over a month now, and he's already stimulated the economy in leaps and bounds. $787 Billion in a one-time stimulus package! Just imagine the good that this bill will have on our families; we will soon have tons of money so that we can give more to the government! I don't know about you, but that thought gives me Hope. It's so good to know that Uncle Sam is watching out for the little guy. Sure, the federal government is behind by $2 Trillion for this fiscal year, but so what? With the higher taxes, we will easily be able to make up that deficit; we might even have some left over to host a parade for the people who work hardest in this country to gain freedom for their beliefs (abortionists and homosexuals). Or, as the Prsident himself said, "We can't generate sustained growth without getting our deficits under control" (1 Liberal 2:17). With a guy like that in charge, how can we go wrong? President Obama is truly turning this nation into an inspiration of hope for the rest of the world.

Yet, once again, the conservatives continue to whine. They dare to question the idea that raising taxes during a recession is a good idea! Imagine, the nerve! Thankfully, our president knows how to handle such "cable chatter", and he dismissed them with the nod, "I won, I'm the president". Oh! Just thinking about that phrase gives me the chills.

Thus, from what I have shown you, we can easily see that the president is obviously a great leader and basketball player, and the conservatives are just bitter and angry that they lost. It fills me with hope that we have an executive branch that is not afraid to stand up to the corporations that power the economic sector and tell them that they need to pay more taxes! What a wonderful guy! I never thought I'd see the day when we could receive an African-American man as the President of the United States; this truly is a new age for Americans. The irony is that it is an African-American who leads this country out of our economic shackles and into the new freedom of economic stimulus, higher taxes, and balanced budgets. Oh, the Hope that proceeds from the heart of all who hear!

Now, let us join hands together, and sing praises to the man who brought us out of the horrid age of Bush and Cheney, and into the time of peace and prosperity for all Mankind!

Obama! Obama! Obama! Obama! Obama! Obama! Read more!